The Road to a Solid Argument

capitola morning beautyYou’d think after decades of married life we would run out of material to argue about, but of course, we haven’t.


It’s the mental wrestling matches over the most trivial issues that really get us. For example, we recently argued about which was the best route to take when going from Point A to Point B. Whenever we visit a particular friend’s house approximately 20 minutes away from where we live my husband insists on going the longer way. Some might think it’s a debatable and ridiculous argument. The differentiation in time is probably between 3 -5 minutes on any given day and could lean in the favor of either direction depending on traffic conditions.


The ongoing argument is actually less about the route than it is about my idea on what saves time. His route has stop signs and mine has signals.


I guess I’m a gambler. I’m also probably less law-abiding than my husband. In my opinion it’s OK to speed up over the limit in order to race through a yellow light. I hate delays and dislike waiting even more. And then there’s the stop sign dilemma. Although I know it’s the law to come to a full stop at an intersection it hardly seems necessary when no one’s at the cross street. Short stops seem equivalent to a yellow light to me.


The stop sign route is a safe bet. There’s no guessing whether the light will change and not much variation in speed since the route is riddled with the annoying signs. My route is a clear shot to our destination unlike my husband’s which winds through town and past the ocean. My way includes a stretch of freeway with a 65mph speed limit.


Today when I was headed to the controversial destination by myself I chose to go my husband’s way – just because. Maybe I secretly wanted to clock it while I was behind the wheel to prove my point once and for all.


Instead of placing my bet against an upcoming light I found myself daydreaming and less concerned about time or speed. I could see the tortoise and hare scenario playing out before my eyes. The slower way was definitely inching along in a more rapid pace than I had experienced when I was arguing my point in transit with my husband.


And then there’s the ocean. Had I really been so set on winning my argument and capturing a couple extra minutes that I’d missed the ocean variable in the equation? Really?


What a waste of time silly arguments can be. If we’re only given so many days on the planet and so many moments – maybe it’s best to go slow. Maybe a steady path that takes a little longer has worth, in and of itself.


Like it or not we’re all headed for the same destination. Our plans, our platforms and our time will one day come to a screeching halt. We won’t be able to avoid the ultimate stop sign waiting for us.

Deciding to take the long way was a good idea. It taught me moments are gifts. Not the minutes I was trying to gain, but moments I was missing.


Moments are given to be fully lived, completely embraced and tenderly shared.


So, I’ve changed my mind on the best route to get to our friend’s house. Whether or not I tell my husband is another discussion.



4 replies on “The Road to a Solid Argument”

    1. I know Shannon! It seems to be the special moments we most need to keep that those crazy minutes want to steal 🙂 Hope your summer is FILLED with abundant moments.

    1. Suzanne – in my opinion you’re a stop sign person. You know how to appreciate ‘the moment’ like no one I know. Even when you’re on a fast track assignment, your eyes are open to everything going on around you. You watch for and see signposts God has left for you. I love it!

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